You screwed up this part so bad that I will not read it anyway. Use the five senses. Xxx vedio I mean everything. 12 comments«123»anonymous readerReport 2013-07-29 21:04:10have to agree not worth reading without PARAGRAPHS PARAGRAPHS PARAGRAPHSanonymous readerReport 2012-07-04 20:54:39Please forget part 2. Keep up the good work, and with practice, you can be one of this site’s best writers. Again, it is an excellent start. If you need someone to read over your stuff, just ask, most people are willing to help out. You screwed up this part so bad that I will not read it anyway. Use the five senses. Hugh_Jardonanonymous readerReport 2012-04-16 20:30:24Good story, but needs some work on the spelling/grammar front. If you need someone to read over your stuff, just ask, most people are willing to help out. I second the emotion of ending a sentence with a period, not a camma. You screwed up this part so bad that I will not read it anyway. Keep going. You’re too close to the action, as it were, to notice little things like continuity errors, word choice, and tenses. Daniels«123» – S. Keep up the good work, and with practice, you can be one of this site’s best writers. Use the five senses. You screwed up this part so bad that I will not read it anyway. Hugh_Jardonanonymous readerReport 2012-04-16 20:30:24Good story, but needs some work on the spelling/grammar front.
